July 9, 2009
how did this happen?
Somehow I became invisible somewhere between now and then I let myself completely fade into the back and became this shell of who I feel I really am or maybe of who I want to be I wake up everyday and eat the same thing for breakfast, drink from the same cup wear the same clothes in a 7 day rotation drive the same route to work only to turn around 9 hours later and drive it in reverse I eat dinner talk to my parents talk to my cats and wonder why it is I can’t find someone to love me why it is I have no friends to speak of why it is I am routinely overlooked I stare out the window maybe do a little sewing watch Law & Order then go to bed by 10pm just to wake up and do it again I feel like I have promise that I have the ability to make it – whatever it is - happen I just don’t know how to start and then get so overwhelmed by thinking about it I give up and take a nap instead I am simply terrified that I am going to wake up the crazy old cat lady only I’ll still be living in my parents basement….
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4 comments:
Ugh, join the queue. Don't we all feel like this at some point?
save up your money, don't get too down on yourself and try jogging or something.... yoga... some little exercise that you could fit into your scheduale would just be better for your self esteem and make you feel better
I'm in the same situation. Don't give up. I just recently graduated from college in May and I am currently looking for a job related to my field. I had money saved for this very reason, but I had to drain my accounts to pay off school. So for two and a half months I have lived on my little sister's couch and worked for a sub shop making minimum wage with a bunch of sixteen year olds. You have to take that step and improve your life. Take it slow. Make a list of 5 things you want to do over the next two weeks that are not routine in your schedule. Good Luck.
You been sucked into the cycle of society. It's make or break. Make an escape, or wait for the break - Break being when, you scream your lungs out like never before! I'd suggest making an escape, and yes, change routine, as others have said it does happen to all of us at some point.
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